DONNA'S DILEMMA by PAPATOAD
It all started to fall apart when my fifteen-year-old daughter, Shelly. received one of those DNA kits for Christmas. I don't even remember who gave it to her. She was all excited as she carefully filled out all of the submission requirements and mailed it in. Six weeks later the results finally came back and she was not happy.
Donna and I quietly sat in the living room reading, when our daughter decided to vocalize her discontent. We couldn't make out the actual words, but things were not going well. After fifteen minutes or so she stormed out of her room and announced that she was going over to her girlfriend's house. Donna reminded her to be home by suppertime as she rushed out of the door. I sat there with an amused grin on my face and noticed that Donna seemed a bit more concerned. We both just shrugged and went on with our reading.
Donna and I got married eighteen years ago, right after I finished my residency. After five years, I was considered the leading gall bladder surgeon in the tri-county area. I had all the work I could handle, and life was good.
And then it all went to hell.
We were attending a social affair sponsored by Donna's company, Gilbert Enterprises when I had some type of seizure, which left me with some Parkinson-like neurological tics. It wasn't Parkinson's, but it appeared to be similar. I had a constant tic in my right eye and my lower right arm would twitch sporadically at inopportune moments. They never did figure out exactly what it was, and for some reason, I was so glad that I was just still functional at all, that I didn't pursue it any further. My days as a surgeon were over, however, so I found a new position as a radiologist.
Nine months later, Shelly was born.
Things seemed to move along as well as could be expected. I was not happy with my new affliction, but I was still fully functioning in most areas. I did very well in my new medical position and the compensation was still quite adequate. My home life and my sex life did not suffer, in fact, Donna seemed to be a bit more accommodating. She turned into a sort of 'Stepford' wife. I figured that she felt a bit guilty because I had my seizure while we were at one of her company functions. In any event, I was enjoying her extra attention, so I didn't complain. I truly loved the woman.
We lived that way for fifteen years.
"Donna, any ideas why Shelly got so upset about the ancestry thing?
"I have no clue. I do think that it is best if we just let it slide. I am sure that she will get over it in a few days, no matter what it is." Something about the way that she said that did not sit right with me. I got the feeling that she was trying to divert me away from it without looking obvious. I just smiled and nodded my head.
I didn't get much reading done the rest of the evening, but I did a hell of a lot of thinking. I tried to relate Shelly's attitude with anything else that might be going on, but nothing popped up. Other than the normal squabbles that all families have, we were in good shape. No money difficulties, no problems in the bedroom, and definitely nothing that could relate to our daughter. I had to get a look at that DNA report.
Donna left for work at Gilbert, and Shelly went to school. I stayed home. I found what I was looking for in her study desk drawer. Donna's family is mostly Irish and mine is mostly Scottish with a bit of German tossed in. It seemed that Shelly was 48% Eastern European. I had to laugh a little at the poor quality of the report. As I read further I noted that there was a list of close matches. Of course, Donna's name was right up top, but my name was nowhere on the list. There were also a few names of relatives from Donna's side of the family, but none of mine. I guessed that the only people that would show up on the list were people who had actually had their DNS documented. Donna, Shelly, and I had ours done five years ago as part of an annual physical. Mine should have been on there if Donna's was.
I was starting to get concerned and then I noted a strange name high up on the list. Teresa Haugen was a 46% match. Who the hell was Teresa Haugen?
"Doctor McCall! This is John Terrell."
"Yes, John. Good to hear from you. Is everything okay?"
"Yeah. No problems. I still have that damn twitch and the eye tic, but other than that I am fine. However, I have a small question. A few years ago you took DNA samples from all of us for our medical records. Could you check something for me?"
"What do you need?"
"I am trying to figure out if there are any glitches in the DNA results between Shelly and myself."
"Glitches? What do you mean by glitches?"
"Look Doc. This is embarrassing, but I am trying to find out if Shelly is my biological daughter or not. I don't want to stir up any trouble, I just need to know."
"Oh, Shit! Pardon my French, John. You know you have access to all those files. You could check it yourself."
"I know, but I would prefer if you did it."
"Let me pull up the files, and I will get back to you. Okay? Give me an hour."
"Thanks, Doc. I really do appreciate it."
I think that Donna could tell that I was troubled. Doctor McCall verified that I was not Shelly's father. I did not tell Donna. For the last three days, I have been trying to figure out what I wanted to do. I was surprisingly calm about the whole situation, and I was able to think about it without blowing my cool. It took me several days to locate Teresa Haugen. For some reason, I assumed that she would be about Shelly's age, and I felt like I was a stalking pedophile. I finally found her in the white pages under a listing for Malcolm Haugen. Malcolm was my age and lived in West Chester. I assumed that she was his daughter.
Malcolm agreed to meet me Saturday morning at a Denny's in Exton. I am not sure that he knew who I was, but I detected a bit of apprehension in his voice.
He was early. I was on time. We exchanged formalities.
"Malcolm, I don't remember ever meeting you before. Have you ever lived in Reading?" That brought a slight grimace to his face. He squirmed in his chair a bit as if trying to get comfortable.
"I worked for Gilbert Enterprises about fifteen years ago or so. I believe we met at one of the company functions back then. I left Reading right after that." He seemed relieved to have said it, but still a bit uncomfortable.
"I take it that you knew my wife Donna?" It was a question phrased as a comment.
He didn't answer; he just nodded.
"Do you know why I am here?"
"Not exactly, but I have a good idea." The few moments of silence were stressful.
"What took you so long?"
"I just found out." More silence.
He let out a deep sigh. "I was young; I had been drinking too much and I was caught up in the moment. I know that that was no excuse and I know it was wrong. I think I caved into the peer pressure more than anything else. Donna, your wife, was one of the most fascinating women I had ever met. I knew she was married, but nobody seemed to care at the moment."
"Who was nobody?" He was still squirming a bit.
"The three of us were from the engineering department; Freddy Springer, Clayton Mankey, and I. Donna was being extra friendly with all of us and we were having a great time. There were a lot of innuendos going around and some of them were getting serious."
"Did anybody think about me at all?"
"Donna was constantly looking around to make sure you were not near us. If I remember correctly you were hanging around with some of the older guys talking about golf."
"How did this all go off the rails?"
"Freddy was trying to talk Donna into talking some ecstasy. She kept saying no. He was pretty persistent. That was when everything turned to shit."
"What does that mean?"
"We were all drunk and we were all horny, including Donna. Freddy asked her one more time and she sighed and said ' Don't drug me you idiots, go drug my husband'."
After another long pause, I looked at him. "Say that again!"
"She said 'Don't drug me you idiots, go drug my husband'. That simple phrase has haunted me for the last fifteen years or so. It was so cold and so calculating that I couldn't believe it."
"What happened next?'
"A few minutes later, Freddy took you a drink. You fell asleep on one of the lounge chairs, and we all went upstairs. It was when we came downstairs an hour later that we found out what happened to you."
"What do you mean?"
"It seemed that you had a bad reaction to the drug Freddy gave you and they had to rush you to the hospital. Donna didn't even know about it until after you were gone."
I didn't say anything.
"First thing Monday morning, I quit Gilbert's and moved back home to West Chester. I got a new job, got married, and now have three kids. I have never been back to Reading. I never saw Donna again. I have always regretted what happened and I am truly sorrowful. I don't know what else I can say or do."
I had the waitress bring us a full pot of coffee.
"Malcolm, have you ever had one of those ancestry tests done?"
"No, but my daughter, Teresa did a few years ago."
"Anybody else in the family?"
"No, just her. She got it as a present. Why do you ask?"
"Your daughter Teresa, and my daughter Shelly, are half-sisters."
I watched as Malcolm sat still, not breathing. He finally blinked his eyes and let out a big sigh. "Shit." I watched him for a few moments until he got some tears in his eyes. His head was slowly shaking from side to side.
"Are you okay?"
"No, I'm not! The worst night of my life just got worse. I can't believe this is happening. This is going to ruin me and my family. I tried so hard to not let anything like that happen again and then this one comes back and bites me in the ass. How much worse can it get?"
We sat quietly for several minutes. "Malcolm, whatever happened to the other two guys?"
"Freddy got killed in a crash on the Schuylkill Expressway. Clayton is an alcoholic and lives in a church rectory in Fishtown. I haven't seen him in years."
"Malcolm, I want to thank you for your time and your honesty. I am not looking for anything else and I have no desire whatsoever for revenge or retribution. You can relax. I won't be coming after you or exposing you."
"That is good to hear, but there is another problem here. What about your, or should I say, my daughter? What if she figures things out and wants to have contact with me? What am I supposed to do? I don't want to hurt or embarrass anybody. Any suggestions?"
"I'll help you any way that I can. I won't initiate anything, but if it comes up, I will be on your side whatever happens. I am not a vindictive man. I am not happy with what happened, but I am not going to ruin my life dwelling on it. Just in case, you might want to prepare your wife so that you don't get caught flat-footed."
My everyday life became miserable. Every time my arm twitched or my eye blinked, I was reminded of my wife's treachery. Every time she was overly nice, or accommodating, I cringed. Like Malcolm, she carried the guilt with her for fifteen years. For all those fifteen years, I loved her because of what I perceived to be her devotion. Now I know that it was not devotion, but guilt. I felt that I could forgive Malcolm, but not Donna. My love for my wife was dying, little by little, every day. It was starting to eat me up. I had to do something before it was too late.
I did something!
"Hi! My name is Lina. Lina Durante. Welcome to Hospital De Santa Marta. You must be John Terrell?"
I had been in Porto for a week, but this was my first visit to the hospital cafeteria. I made a clumsy attempt to stand up and held out my hand to greet my unexpected guest. This caused her to giggle a bit.
"May I join you?" I just nodded as she sat. She wasn't what I would call beautiful, but she was damn attractive for a middle age woman.
"So you are the new reader? Glad to see you as part of the team. Have you gotten settled in?" She was obviously a local but spoke perfect English as did most of the staff.
"Yes! Everything is coming along fine. I got a furnished condo within walking distance of the hospital. All I have to do now is find a few good places to eat close by."
"Oh good! I can help you with that. I am an expert at finding places to eat." She did a great job of breaking the ice.
"What department do you work in Lina?"
"I am a neurosurgeon. I am sure that we will be working together regularly. I understand that you have much experience."
Pretty much across the board. I will be reading all the x-rays, ct scans, MRIs, mammograms, and ultrasounds, as well as tea leaves on occasion." That got me a small laugh.
"Have you always done that?"
"No! I am sure that you have noticed my eye tic and the twitch in my right hand. Before my affliction, I did laparoscopic gallbladder surgery. Switching over to radiology allowed me to continue working. I feel that I am still able to contribute."
"What exactly was the affliction?"
"You know, I never really did find out. There was a lot of discussion and a lot of conjecture, but never anything definite. I felt that everybody was being evasive. I tried pinning it down a few times and got frustrated, so I just quit."
"Enough chit-chat. I have to get back to work. I get off at six. I'll pick you up here and we will explore your first dining experience. You are working straight days, right?" I smiled and nodded.
Lina Durante was unmarried. I didn't ask why or explore the subject further. After a month, I was comfortable enough with her to explain my marital status. The fact that I was still married did not seem to bother her. Two weeks later she started staying overnight at my condo. Life was good.
I had no contact with my wife or my daughter. My relationship with Donna got cooler and cooler before I left, although she kept trying to keep it together. The problem was all on my side. She tried to get me to explain what was wrong and I never did. Shelly became completely withdrawn. I tried to keep that relationship going, but she killed it. It got to the point where we barely talked at all. She never explained what her displeasure with me was. I didn't ask, but I think it was pretty obvious that it was connected to that damn DNA test.
I didn't tell Donna that I was leaving. I simply left her a power of attorney to sell the house and took half of our savings. She had a good job and would have no problem supporting herself and Shelly. I am sure that she would end up selling the house. I also left my wedding ring. Let her figure it out.
Donna never tried to find me or contact me. If she did know where I was, I was not aware of it.
"John. I set aside a time slot to see you at nine AM Friday in my clinic. It's a routine thing so don't get too excited about it." Lina was trying to be casual.
"That doesn't make sense and you know it. What is going on?"
"It's the eye tic thing, John. I just want to check it out a bit."
"Don't you think that you should get an ophthalmologist?"
"Doctor Perez will be there. He is the best we have. We are not going to do anything, just look around."
"Lina, I don't trust you. I know bull shit when I smell it."
"Just shut up, John. Be there at nine."
Well, Doctor Perez was not there. There was an anesthesiologist there, however, and before I knew it, I was fast asleep.
Lina was sitting on my bed when I recovered. She was grinning at my obvious displeasure. "Are you mad at me John?" I didn't quite feel like talking so I just grunted at her. It didn't take long for me to figure it out. I no longer had the eye tic or the hand twitch. I held up my right hand and stared with amazement. It was rock steady. My hand immediately went up to my head, and Lina started laughing, as I felt around for bandages. There were none.
"It's laparoscopic, John. You of all people should have figured that out." I gave her an idiotic stare as if to question her.
"Up your nose, you idiot." And she laughed again.
Over the next few months, I worked with the surgical department to get re-certified. I decided to stay with the radiology department and just fill in if any gall bladder surgeries were required. Everybody was happy with the new arrangement.
Lina and I moved in together, and things went very well over the next two years. I think she would have liked to get married, but under the circumstances, she didn't want to push it.
It was a warm summer afternoon and I was sitting on the veranda with a bottle of Lancer's Rose. "John. You have a guest." Lina paused for a moment. "I'll be going down to the market for a while." She didn't wait for an answer.
"Hello, John. It's been a long time." It had been almost four years since I saw my wife. She still looked good, but a little tired around the eyes.
"Donna! You are looking well. Can I get you something to drink?"
"The wine looks fine." She sat while I fetched a glass. We were silent for several moments.
We chatted about the house, the weather, and her flight over. Finally, I couldn't stand it anymore. "Donna. Why are you here? What do you want."
"I just wanted some closure. I want to wrap things up, so we can move on. I need a few answers, and I feel that you do also. You refused to talk before. I think I understand why. I just need about thirty minutes or so."
"You flew fifteen hours to talk for thirty minutes?"
"I had to do it face to face."
"Okay! Go ahead."
"After a year, I figured that you were not coming back. I sold the house and got a small apartment for Shelly and myself. This is a check for half of the house." She placed it on the table between us.
"I filed for divorce by abandonment. That took a year, but it is done and it is clean and clear. You are now free to do as you please." She placed a second document on the table.
"Shelly is engaged to be married in a couple of months and asked me to give you this invitation. She was hoping that you would be able to give her away. She completely understands if you decide not to do it. She realizes that her behavior was inappropriate the last few months and apologizes for it."
The invitation joined the other papers.
"I wanted to thank you for the checks that you send to Shelly's college account every month. It really made a big difference. Under the circumstances, I didn't expect it." That one caught me by surprise. I never sent any checks. I did have an idea where they came from, however.
"Of course, I was hoping to find out exactly why you left, but I will understand if you refuse to tell me. If you still decide not to say anything, can I at least answer any questions for you?"
She pause and took a sip of the rose. I figured it was my turn to talk now.
"Donna. I did not want half of the house money, but if it makes you feel any better, I will gladly accept it. I didn't bother filing for a divorce because I had no intention of getting married again. However, things have changed now, so the divorce is appreciated."
"I understand. She is very beautiful."
"I do not think it would be appropriate for me to give Shelly away at her wedding. I think that honor should go to her father." As I finished that sentence, Donna dropped her wine glass on the tile patio floor. There was a gasp as her mouth dropped open. I took a few minutes to clean up the glass and such as she composed herself.
She seemed to be struggling to come up with a reply. "John, I don't mean to be a smart-ass bitch or anything like that, and I am also not trying to be evasive or defensive, but who do you suggest I contact?"
"How about one of the three guys that you had sex with the night that I had my attack." Luckily she didn't have a glass in her hand this time.
After about thirty seconds of incoherent babbling mixed with sobbing, she finally blurted out. "I think I made a mistake coming here. I was hoping for closure, but not like this. I think I should go." She started to get up, but I insisted on sitting her back down.
"No, you don't! You opened this can of worms, now finish what you started. You felt that by coming here, open-handed, you were taking the high road. It was intended to make me feel like a shit for leaving and deserting my wife and daughter. Sorry, that dog don't hunt. Why don't you tell me all about it, including why you had the medical report covered up."
Just then Lina came back and noticed what was going on. "Oh crap John. What the hell did you do?"
"Nothing. We were just talking about old times and she went to pieces."
Lina took Donna inside the house and laid her on the sofa. She got a wet compress and some kind of pills which she gave her. I stayed out of the way. I was the bad guy. How the hell did that happen? I went to the kitchen and got a Super Bock. The wine wasn't hacking it.
"John, why don't I talk to her? Maybe she won't get so upset. You must have come on pretty heavy. Is there anything specific that you want me to ask her?"
"Yeah! A couple of things. Some of them, I already know the answers, but I would like to see if she verifies them. The others I just don't know. Ask her the names of the three guys she had sex with that night. Did she see them again? See if you can find out if there were any other guys and any other times. Just curious. Ask her why she had the medical report of my seizure covered up. Ask her why we didn't have any more kids."
'Stop! Too much information. That's a bit of an overload. I'll do the best that I can. Why don't you go out on the patio and relax? Grab a couple more beers."
I fell asleep and two hours later Lina was shaking me awake. "I gave her a sedative. She is in the guest bedroom for the rest of the night."
"Did anything productive come out of it?"
"Once I got her started, I couldn't shut her up. The only thing she remembers about the three guys is that one of them was named Freddy. He was trying to get her to take some kind of drug, but she remembers that she kept refusing. She did not admit to telling him to drug you. I don't think she will ever admit that."
"So, how was the sex?"
"She didn't say, but from how she described it, it must have been pretty good. It looks like it was a one-off. I don't know why she did it. I couldn't get any hints about any other escapades. She never saw or heard from the guys again. She suspected that one of them was Shelly's father, but she never looked into it any further. She was afraid when Shelly got the DNA test kit at Christmas but didn't know how to handle it. She assumed that you figured it out and that is why you left."
"Wow! Good recap. That covers a lot of it.
"She also asked why you no longer had the eye tic or the twitch. I explained to her that it was an easy fix and should have been done years ago, except the diagnosis had been covered up for some reason. That triggered another sobbing episode; so I just left her alone. She should sleep until morning."
"It is hard to believe, but I used to love that woman. I always thought that love like that lived forever, but that is not true. I struggled for fifteen years that I shouldn't have. All the attention and love that she shared with me, over the years, was just a way to cover up for her treachery. It wasn't love."
"John, you sound bitter."
"Lina, I have to leave for a few days. When Donna wakes up in the morning, can you see to it that she gets to the airport? Tell her that I will not attend Shelly's wedding. Also let her know that the checks that she got came from Shelly's father, not me."
"Where will you go?"
"I don't know. It will just be for a week or so. You will be here when I get back, right?"
"Of course, I will. Promise that you won't drink too much. Call me."
And so ends that part of my life. I never did see or hear from Donna or Shelly again. Lina and I did not marry, but we did buy a nice little villa together, just outside of Porto. I decided to take up oil painting after watching some Michael James Smith videos. I am actually getting pretty good. The villa did come with a nice little studio.
Lina got me a DNA kit for Christmas. That's not funny.
